Self-confidence during the hard times

Unexpected economical turns In nowadays financial situation is unstable and sometimes very complicated.  Everyone thinks about his job and stable income. Different political disagrees in the government may cause situations like “shutdown”, when thousands of employees went home until politicians find a way to solve their difference.

When people worry about their future, about their income there is a place for stress and fear.  Nobody wants it! Most people dream to have a good job with possibilities, where they will be able pay bills, live normal live and build a better future for their kids. It is not easy to see what is going on in your country and a just feel yourself confident while you have no idea about the future.

The most important question that bothers many people in this hard time is how to fight stress and be calm until the happy end?

There are 10 simple steps that are going to help you stay calm and get your confidence.

1.       Do not think too much about a bad situation! If you think a lot about something, it takes best of you. You mind become “paralyzed” by the bad thoughts. You need to avoid them. If situation hard and concerns you and your family, try to concentrate on something else like a TV show, chat with a friend, read a good book, but do not ignore a problem.

2.       Discuss you it with people with similar problems! For example, if there is some problem with your job – you are not alone. There are people who have a solution.  Who knows? Maybe they see a situation from different perspective?  After you talk to them, it will be easier for you to deal with this issue. Avoid people who panic. Their bad emotions can affect your as well.

3.       You need to free your mind from poisoning thoughts! The best way to do that is to write them down. Be  honest with yourself. Analyze them. When you see your deepest fears on a paper, it is easier for you to find a solution.  There is always a way to make your life better!

4.        Find your way out! There are no bad solutions. There are many possibilities around you! What you should do? You need to see them!  It is like to play a billiard – there are many perspectives to win a game.

5.       Do not isolate yourself from the people! The most common mistake that people usually do is hiding.   It is our natural need to hide during the “danger”, but you have to fight it. Find people who you feel comfortable with. In some situations you may have a feeling that nobody understands you,  there is no sense to talk to anybody. Well it is just an illusion! You are not alone is the world.  There are some people who behave in that way?  See other people!

6.       Do not hold bad feelings from past inside of you. If somebody hurt you or the situation was bad in your past, just write things that upset you and analyze them in details. Find your way! Remember, if somebody was rude to you or caused you an emotional trauma; be better than those who did it to you!

7.       Build your plans for future! Very often people get depressed because they think too much about their problems and about all those negative histories in their lives. Sure, there is a lesson to be learned, you need to move on! Except that, when you make plans for your future, you help your mind to “change a wave” for something else. You know that present unpleasant situation is temporary and you are going to have a good future.

8.       Think positive! It is kind of hard to do, especially if you are nervous a lot about something. When you calm down a little and working on you plans, after you done fear and anxiety comes back. Do not concentrate too much on it – it is temporary. Remember, there is always a good solution for you – one way or another!

My friend finds out about a possibility to visit France with a university club. All costs suppose covers club. He had to pay just  basic fees. He needed to win university’s lottery. There was a big chance that he could be one of those lucky people. He did his paper work, applied all documents and started to wait…After they showed results, in spate of good preparation from his side; his name wasn’t on that list. They chose somebody else. He was very upset… In the next year, I found out that he won a trip to Germany. Payment conditions were the same. He waited some time and visit one of Western European country anyway. Patient is very important.

9.       Be patient! If you did get something that you wanted, it probably because it was not you time yet.  You probably need to wait a little bit and you will get it! The same I can say about bad situation. It already has happened! From the future perspective it is just an event from past.

10.    Move on! If you work hard and there is no result, that means either you need to wait a bit more or in current situation it is impossible to do what you want. You need to change something in your life. It is hard to do but it is possible! You need to make sure, that there is no interferences like a way of your thinking.

For example you need more money to pay your bills. You have a job, but you paychecks too small to do that. There are at least two solutions (you can find a lot more) either you work harder and get a promotion etc. or you can get a better job in spite of those hard times. If you already got a promotion but it is not enough, then you definitely need to change a job. There is nothing to be scared of. Some people making mistake by negative thinking like that: “I’ll never find a better job or I am not qualify enough to do that”. As I’ve written before there is a way that you need to find. Sometime you need to move on first and then look for the way!

I am not a psychologist or therapist, but I saw different situations, had some by myself;  talked with different people, read different books … There always a possibility to make a better life!!!

 Sure thing, if you have complicated situation, you either should read books that specialist have written to people who want to live better life or see a specialist and find a solution together.  

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